Years have now passed and you have added and removed multiple cars from your train. You have been through many different learning opportunities, lessons, and hardships. But nothing could have completely prepared you for the change that your train was about to endure.

You all of a sudden have twice as many cars to deal with and a whole lot of new passengers that you don’t know. Everything seems to be turned upside down and backwards. There is nothing the same, because your cars are now mingled/mixed with someone else’s. That’s right. Your train has been brought together with another one through marriage.

Marriage is an exciting time for every couple, but what most don’t think about is the different cars that they will bring along. Remember they have a childhood car, a friend’s car, and even their very own baggage car that they just added to your train, and you have added to their train. There are going to be things you don’t like and may want them to remove, and they will have the same for you.

It takes time to figure out how your trains/lives will work together. Marriage is a union, a gift from God, but it takes work for two separate people to come together in harmony. It requires God’s help and your willingness to work together toward a common goal.

Eventually, you will have to leave the wedding car and learn more about the personal interests and needs of your significant other. You will have to explain to them your desires, likes and dislikes. And each of you may need to remove things from your joined train to grow closer together.

For example, when me and my husband got married, I loved hanging out with friends every night. Now there is nothing wrong with going out with friends, but my husband preferred being alone at home in the quiet after work. We had to figure out how to compromise and work with each other on what the other person needed. I still go out to be with friends, but I try to do it when he is at work, so that I can be with him when he is home. Or on the weekends we only go out for part of the day, so that he can relax in the quiet the rest of the day. It took us time and some failed attempts, but ultimately, we found something that worked and we love it. We both get what we need.

Now that example maybe seem insignificant, but it was something that was important to us. It could have caused a bigger issue if not taken care of. There are so many other things that we have had to work through, like the type of foods we eat, the movies we watch, the friends or people we hang out with, where we go on trips, and even how much time we spend with different family members. They are all seemingly small issues, but those little things can cause big problems if not talked about.

You don’t want a break in your train, that only causes disasters. Marriage, or joining trains, can be scary and sometimes frustrating, but in the end, it can turn into something beautiful. Like I already said, you may have to remove a few things or even add a few things, but in the end you both will share a train that is unique and beautiful. You just have to be willing to try.