Dear Proper Purpose,

Too often when we are single we forget our purpose. We get so caught up in our need for a relationship that we lose sight of why we were actually created. Instead of using our free time in staying busy serving Jesus, we waste hours trying to pursue and snag an available guy. And we encourage ourselves to use our time to sponsor pity parties (sometimes with others), when we should be rediscovering our purpose.

Instead of being drained by our discouraging circumstances, we need to take advantage of this time and diligently embrace each day. Ruth did this when she became a widow by binding herself to the service of the Lord.

What does that mean? Well, … It means serving Him diligently and not letting your lack of a relationship cause your life to unravel because you never envisioned not having a boyfriend by this point in your life. But did you ever think that you’re allowing singleness to distract you from something that might be more satisfying than a promised date every weekend?

“Whatever might blur the vision God had given [your name] of His work, whatever could distract or deceive or tempt others to seek anything but the Lord Jesus Himself she tried to eliminate.”

– Amy Carmichael

We need to be aware of the things that are filling our minds and time, then remove them. God did not create us with the purpose of finding a boyfriend or even a husband. No. Our “Proper Purpose” is to have a relationship . . . with God. We become unraveled because that isn’t what we should be pursuing in the first place.

Our purpose, all young women’s purposes, have been guided by the world’s “perfect plan” for relationships: start dating young then get married and start a family by 25. When that “perfect plan” doesn’t seem to be working, then we as women see ourselves as failures. That is why God never designed our lives to be that way. There is no “perfect plan”, but there is God’s plan. And God’s plan for you, “Your Proper Purpose” is to serve Him; then he can write that romantic story you have been dreaming about.

I hope this helps point you in the right direction to finding your purpose again.

                                                                       Signing off,
                                                                       Tami