This topic brought back a lot of memories for me. I learned very early on that my words and actions can have a huge effect on others. So much to the point that it can influence them to actions or thoughts that they may or may not have originally had. That is why, discretion, in my life, became very important.

Matthew 12:36 But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment.

When I was in college, I had a girl-friend that you can say was not in the best place in her life. For the longest time, I said nothing and I did nothing, which may sound terrible, but… in truth, it may have been the best thing.

Discretion is the ability to avoid words, actions, and attitudes which could result in undesired consequences.

Reading that definition, I am reminded of my mother’s words, “Don’t be a Thumper!” which if you have ever seen the movie Bambi you know that Thumper’s mother always said, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” Sometimes it is better to say nothing, then to say something you will regret.

A person of discretion is one that values silence, to allow himself to think BEFORE he speaks. He also stays silent afterward so that the hearer can consider his message. Discretion helps someone to be cautious and thoughtful, rather than reckless and impulsive.

Too many times, we let our emotions cause us to create situations that could have been avoided, and could have prevented people from being hurt or relationships broken.

Our choices can bring honor or disgrace to ourselves, but also to Christ’s name. To avoid the negativity of simplemindedness, or the lack of discretion, we must study God’s word (I recommend starting in Proverbs). Through our studying and spiritual growth, we will gain wisdom in knowing how to discern what words, actions, and attitudes we should avoid. The Holy Spirit will also guide us in each situation – helping us consider possible results, so that we can make an appropriate decision on our actions.

Going back to that girlfriend in college. After several years of staying silent, watching “more mature” Christians try to help her with no avail, I felt the Holy Spirit telling me it was time to finally speak up.

I didn’t know what to say or do, that could actually make a difference. I didn’t want to say anything that could cause more harm than help. But then one evening, I felt that little push to confront her on her actions that were going against God. I prayed so hard for the Holy Spirit’s guidance. And he gave it. the moment I walked out of that room after talking to her, my mind could not remember what I had said. It was like the Holy Spirit talked through me, and I wasn’t even there, which may sound scary, but to me… It was a relief. I knew that what I said wasn’t my words, but God’s through me.

1 Corinthians 2:10,13-14 But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God. Which things also we speak, not in the words which man’s wisdom teacheth, but which the Holy Ghost teacheth; comparing spiritual things with spiritual. But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned.

We need to make sure that our words and actions are in line with God’s wisdom, not our own. I can with confidence say that I was able to use discretion in this particular situation. But sad to say, this friend did not listen. She made a choice, and you need to as well.

What will you choose?